"Please dad, no! You're going to embarrass me!" I was preparing to offer a toast during dinner. Thirty of my daughter's friends had gathered on the outdoor patio at the new Indian Creek Nature Center, in celebration of Betsy's 16th birthday.
Many of Betsy's friends are classmates from Kennedy H.S., but there were friends from other schools, church friends, and even a couple of former classmates from her preschool days.
My daughter pleaded with me not to say anything. I told her, "I'm not going to embarrass you... too much." I thanked her guests for coming. I also told them I had a story to share:
Not many people know this, but Betsy was sent to the principal's office during her very first week of Kindergarten. It seems she pinched another girl for not wanting to play with her.
"You can often determine the character of someone by the friends whom they surround themselves," I said. "As I look out over your smiling faces, I see smart, talented, funny, handsome and beautiful young people." I told them how happy Theresa and I were to have all of them there. I finished my toast by saying, "I hope that all of you remain good friends for a long, long time."
After the toast, I momentarily stepped away for a bottle of water. When I returned, I was amazed to see her guests going around the table, and one-by-one standing and sharing how they met Betsy, or a funny story about her. There was Grace, who shared that she and Betsy planned to be veterinarians when they were in preschool. A couple of the girls admitted that they were afraid or intimidated by Betsy when they first met, but they quickly got over it. Sam said that he not only appreciated Betsy's friendship, but considered Theresa to be his second mom. The concept of teenagers standing up and speaking in public uncoerced was astounding. There was laughter to the point of tears. Listening to them share stories of their love and admiration of my daughter was priceless.
The last person to stand was Raelyn. She was the girl that Betsy had pinched, way back during that first week of Kindergarten. Today she is Betsy's dear friend. Her words were heartfelt, and summed up what many of them had shared. Then they spontaneously broke into an energetic rendition of "Happy Birthday". It truly was a magical night.
When a child is born, as parents we do everything we possibly can to help them succeed. We have dreams for them—that they will be happy and healthy, and do well in school. We hope that they grow up confident and kind, discover their talents and find joy in their lives. And we hope that they learn to be a good friend, and have good friends in return.
Being a teenager is never easy, and sometimes all we can hope is that they survive the difficult times. So on Betsy's 16th birthday, we were reminded that we have a wonderful daughter, who has grown up to be a fine young woman. She has an amazing group of friends who didn't mind sharing how they feel about her.
It was the best gift any teenager could receive. And it was equally wonderful for her parents.